| them: | will you marry me |
|---|---|
| me: | thanks |
| them: | for what? |
| me: | for thinking I'm emotionally stable enough to marry you. |
story time
so about 7 months ago, my girlfriend at the time asked me to move in. so i did and we lived together for roughly 6 weeks. she asked me to move out until i was mature enough to live with a girl because in those 6 weeks i drew a dick on her face while she was sleeping 11 times.
(via edating)
how the fuck are all these people able to just run into celebrities in restaurants and gas stations and shit i’m lucky if i find two matching socks in a load of laundry on the first try
(Source: jaclcfrost, via geomtery)
i love watching my innocent friends slowly transform into beautiful horny butterflies as we get older
(via pizzaforpresident)
no one ever talks about peter pan’s brother
peter pot
peter pot
the only boy who was higher than peter panand this is probably why no one talks about him
peter pot is so high, he neverlands.
and it’s definitely not because of any faith or trust or pixie dust
why would peter pan’s brother have the same first name and a different surname
generalized animosity towards western developers is becoming increasingly warranted when their answer to the call for more innovative and compelling gaming experiences in the face of a market being dominated by comparatively shallow mobile gaming is better lighting and fog effects and higher polygon counts in character’s eyebrows
what
strawberries and white chocolate! yummmm!!!!
….that’s cum isn’t it
no it’s white chocolate drizzle
(Source: seven-jeff)
if you are cute and pay attention to me i will probably fall in love with you within 15 minutes
(via malikmydick)
